Paddy is forced to share a cell with a Cliff Richard impersonator and tennis enthusiast. TVTropes is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported License. Max and Paddy's Road to Nowhere is a British sitcom starring and written by Peter Kay and Patrick McGuinness. After knocking down a cow in the countryside, Max and Paddy approach who they believe to be the farmer and ask for compensation. * FatAndSkinny: Max and Paddy respectively. * AccidentalPublicConfession: Although it occurs in private; during an argument, Max's ex-girlfriend Tina frustratedly blurts out that [[spoiler: they have a child together.]]. * AssShove: When Paddy was a child he used to frequently shove ''Franchise/StarWars'' action figures up his arse and once had to be taken to hospital after sticking an Obi-Wan Kenobi figure up there. He's not. * ToBeContinued: Episode Three ends on the cliffhanger of [[spoiler: Max and Paddy stealing a school bus full of children in an attempt for Max to see his son. He claims they can sell it on at market for around 300. Max and Paddy try to sell the pig on but no-one will take it as it is too old. Potter fails to listen, and the whole wing later see him on the news talking about 'the doormen' Max and Paddy: thus revealing their stories as lies. %%* SensitiveGuyAndManlyMan: Max and Paddy. The pair thus decide to go out to a nightclub to cheer themselves up and relax, but Max's uncoordinated dancing spoils the night and he ends up fighting with some sailors home on shore leave. * ThirdPersonPerson: Paddy is this fairly frequently. With Tenor, maker of GIF Keyboard, add popular Max And Paddy animated GIFs to your conversations. Tina finally gets the duo out, but now before a payback for Potter Is due.Welcome to the Official Peter Kay YouTube channel! [[spoiler: They're better known as the Belgrano Sisters ( "on account of all the sailors that have gone down on them"]]) and their MO is to pick up sailors in nightclubs, [[SlippingAMickey drug them]], and rob them blind. * BadassLongcoat: Billy the Butcher wears one of these. * PrisonEpisode: [[spoiler:Episode Four after being set up at the end of Episode Three. Today at 2:34 AM * ThemeNaming: Max and his school friends all have nicknames derived from their names that end in "ster": Max-ster, Wolf-ster, Patel-ster, and [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment Foster-ster]]. The prisoners also turn against them after finding they are not big time thiefs, money they have also promised to Mr. Big for the easy life. Max agrees just to get Raymond off their backs and receive preferential treatment, including access to luxury chocolates and Sky+ . ]], * PrisonsAreGymnasiums: [[spoiler: Episode Four includes a scene set in the prison's exercise yard and at the start of the episode, Paddy's cellmate challenges him and Max to a game of tennis.]]. ** Tina has an offscreen one in Episode Four thats both intentional and accidental. The staff, however get punished as well as Brian, at the end of Episode 4. Raymond has heard about the pair's alleged big-money heists and robberies, and wants a cut of their money. While awaiting Tina's reluctant assistance to get them freed, they are forced to make a deal with Raymond the Bastard to share their non-existent loot. ** In Max and Paddys defence, they did tell Brian that he was going to ruin their chances of freedom, so Brian should have known that that something bad was going come out of this. They still end up in cells next door to each other though. * CoitusInterruptus: After Max and Paddy bring two girls back the motorhome, Paddy predictably has sex with one while Max prefers to have a drink and a civilised chat with the other. He trained at the Academy Drama School, where he was the recipient of the Stage Scholarship. Max and Paddy get sent to jail for their crimes. A chase eventually ensues through the services and along a motorway tunnel bridge, and Shannon shoots Paddy in the bottom. [[GassHole A lot.]] What Shows Have Been Renewed or Canceled. Image shows from L to R: Paddy (Paddy McGuinness), Max (Peter Kay). The entire male staff of the Phoenix Club (expect Brian) in Episode 4, stripped nude and sprayed with disinfectant. A spoof fitness DVD was released, Max & Paddy's The Power of Two, including several gags and pieces of scenery from the main series. This calls for them to take drastic action. * TheRealSpoofbusters: Parodied with Mick Bustin', a Brummie car repairman with a Ghostbusters-themed garage shop, played by Noddie Holder of Music/Slade. They agree to let Shannon, who is looking for his estranged son, hitch a ride around. You've gotta go to the police and tell them I'm Daniel's dad, then they'll know why I did it. Doesn't take long before they try selling it. * FatBastard: Not Max, but one of Raymond the Bastard's hired thugs is pretty fat. Max actually has to wear goggles to defend his eyes. They soon realise that they have been conned. * AnOfferYouCantRefuse: Raymond makes one with Max and Paddy for his share of the (fictitious) treasure they're pretending to have stolen. Though Paddy [[ADateWithRosiePalms doesn't get very far]] before the volume wakes Max up. * VocalEvolution: Max's voice is different than in Phoenix Nights because continuing it would have risked long-term damage to Peter Kay's voice. Tina finally gets the duo out, but now before a payback for Potter Is due. * DisabledSnarker: A woman with a HookHand flips Paddy off when he tries his CasanovaWannabe shtick on her. They do get cornered by local DepravedHomosexual Raymond the Bastard in the showers, after dropping soap, but [[SubvertedTrope he doesn't rape them]]. * ActorAllusion: Paddy's full name is revealed to be Patrick O'Shea. After an altercation with a camp inmate called Pepe, Max and Paddy are soon confronted by the main man of their wing, Raymond The Bastard (played by Everal Walsh), who is also Pepe's boyfriend. ]], '''Brian:''' [[spoiler: Sponge and a bit of jam. Elsewhere Paddys love of pornography is mentioned quite frequently. 35K views, 99 likes, 4 loves, 100 comments, 86 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from No Context Max and Paddy: You've got yourself a deal Mr Bastard! The real farmer is more concerned about the death of his cow and so matters have to be resolved. * FanDisservice: At the end of Episode Four, we see the male cast of Series/PhoenixNights (apart from Brian) naked when [[spoiler: Max and Paddy call in an anthrax threat and they are forced to strip naked and get hosed down with some kind of chemical suppressant.]]. On the DVD packaging, it is now referred to as "The UK's fastest selling fitness DVD Ever!" Raymond reasons with them after hearing about their "heists" and "raids". He's a bog-standard white man. The room full of male bodybuilders is certainly a clue though. * LudicrousGibs: Implied in the case of the weird farmer's wife, who got killed by a combine harvester. Theyre generally decent guys but not above stealing and conning people if it will benefit them. He also calls people a clown or a melon if they've said something absurd. Menu. ]], * EstablishingCharacterMoment: [[AxCrazy Billy the Butcher]] is introduced beating, * IWantMyBelovedToBeHappy: An example that is both romantic and non-romantic at the same time. Phoenix Nights spin-off focusing on the adventures of the two doormen. * {{Hypocrite}}: When Max reveals that their new TV has no speakers, Paddy angrily calls Gypsy Joe a, * IWantMyBelovedToBeHappy: An example that is both romantic and non-romantic at the same time. Rating: 7.60/10 (avg out of 3450 votes) Max & Paddy's Road to Nowhere Airs: Friday. Kay and McGuinness do not provide the DVD audio commentary. Their situation worsens when Mick Bustin tries to charge them 500 to retrieve the campervan, causing the pair to break into Bustin's workshop and, in a parody of The A-Team, modify the van and 'bust' out back on to the road, only for the van to break down again miles later, Mick Bustin having never actually made any repairs. [[spoiler: She tells the Police why Max and Paddy stole a school bus full of children (Max was trying to meet his long lost son), which gets them released from prison but (more immediately) gets them pulled out of the exercise yard just as Raymond The Bastard and cronies are approaching them with the intention of savagely beating and quite possibly killing them. [1] A spin-off from Peter Kay's Phoenix Nights, the series follows the two Bolton doormen/bouncers Maxwell "Max" Bygraves (Kay) and Patrick "Paddy" O'Shea (McGuinness) as they tour around the UK in their campervan. Whilst in the wood, Patrick reveals his full name whilst Max reveals some of his own secrets. Permissions beyond the scope of this license may be available from thestaff@tvtropes.org. ''Max And and Paddy's Road To to Nowhere'' is Creator/Channel4 BritCom spun-off from the popular comedy ''Series/PhoenixNights'' that sees former Phoenix Club doormen Max (Creator/PeterKay) and Paddy (Paddy [=McGuinness=]) aimlessly travelling around Britain in a motorhome that they bought with the proceeds from faking an assassination and They then return to the farm to give back the pig and get their money back to find that the old man was not the farmer but in fact the farmer's alcoholic father-in-law. Raymond is the worse of Paddy's nightmares when Paddy drops the soap, and is eagerly commented about his manhood as "Stunning, like a young Burt Reynolds!". While waiting, Max and Paddy catch the train to Middlewood, which actually turns out to be the last one that day, so the pair are forced to trek back through the woods, but get lost. Sign Up. It was broadcast on Channel 4 and began on 12 November 2004, running for six 30-minute episodes up until 17 December 2004. [[spoiler: Max decides not to tell his long lost son Daniel that he is his real father; allowing Daniel, Tina, and Kevin. * PrecisionFStrike: Mick Bustins OhCrap moment. * PaperThinDisguise: Max and Paddys paramedic disguises during the TV theft in Episode One. [2] Paddy is forced to share a cell with a tennis-playing Cliff Richard impersonator who actually believes he is Cliff. Upon realising soon after that Joe didn't sell them the speakers to go with it, a sad Max and Paddy go to a club to find some women. * AbsenteeActor: Jerry and Ray Von do not appear in the Phoenix Nights sections of the show with Marc Park ['That Peter Kay Thing'] taking over as Les Alanos' singer. After a raunchy night at the campervan, Paddy wakes up to find that they've stolen his wallet. It comes to a close when the two of them manage to return to the garage. * EmbarrassingNickname: When he was a child, Paddy wore callipers and braces and was nicknamed Spazzy Paddy. That's Pepe's - Raymond the Bastard's girlfriend's! They end up changing their minds by the end of the episode [[spoiler:when they see a pig- possibly the same pig they bought from the farmer and ended up caring for- roast and served at a pub, and order two nut cutlets instead]]. * DepravedHomosexual: While Raymond The Bastard is more evil than depraved; his first scene features him in the shower being lathered up by two of his cronies and complementing Paddys genitals. * EvilIsPetty: Billy the Butcher gets into childish arguments with Paddy over song titles. The motor home originally purchased by Max in Phoenix Nights was a Ford; however, the motor home they use in Max and Paddy's Road to Nowhere is a Fiat. [1] Max decides not to tell his son that he is his real father, allowing the family to get on with their lives without him interfering.]]. Their disguises are far from convincing, their acting is terrible, and their "stretcher" is the stolen TV under a blanket. On 22 February 2010, Peter Kay stated to The Sun that he and Paddy McGuinness planned to do more specials of Max and Paddy's Road To Nowhere. The DVD also included extra workout tips and a segment instructed by Brian Potter live from the Phoenix Club. ]], ** Also Max and Paddy in Episode Four when [[spoiler: a news report about. The pair arrive in London where Max finds that his old school friend Kevin Wolfston, known as the Wolfster, is holding a 40th birthday party. Max & Paddy's Road to Nowhere: With Peter Kay, Paddy McGuinness, Lisa Hammond, Tony Mooney. Billy also appears in said flashback before he returns as the main supporting character in Episode Six. They soon discover though that he's obsessed with Max ("Not in a gay way" he claims), and detests Paddy because Paddy took Billys job when Billy went to prison. We don't have any reviews for Max and Paddy's Road to Nowhere. ]], * PrisonRape: Mentioned a number of times by Paddy [[spoiler: when he and Max are in prison.]] He [[LampshadeHanging points out]] how stupid it is to expect this.]]. Eventually, she goes to the Police and gets Max and Paddy released at the cost of keeping her secret, as well as finally letting Max meet Daniel after his release.]] * PaperThinDisguise: Max and Paddy's paramedic disguises during the TV theft in Episode One. ]], * [[spoiler: PrisonsAreGymnasiums: Episode Four includes a scene set in the prison's exercise yard and at the start of the episode, Paddy's cellmate challenges him and Max to a game of tennis.]]. ]], ** Also Max and Paddy in Episode Four when [[spoiler: a news report about them, set up by Brian, is seen on one of the prison's TV; blowing their persona of rich gangsters and revealing to Raymond The Bastard that they have been lying to him.]]. He has also appeared in Coronation Street and Emmerdale. The revelation about the girls they took home means that this very likely was the case. * PreAssKickingOneLiner: [[spoiler:"'Ave it!" Tina finally gets the duo out, but now before a payback for Potter Is due. [[spoiler: She tells the Police why Max and Paddy stole a school bus full of children (Max was trying to meet his long lost son), which gets them released from prison but (more immediately) gets them pulled out of the exercise yard just as Raymond The Bastard and cronies are approaching them with the intention of savagely beating and quite possibly killing them. ]], * LuxuryPrisonSuite: [[spoiler: Max and Paddy get one complete with duvets, a box of, ** Replace "crap" with "fuck" and you've got Mick Bustins exact reaction when he sees [[spoiler: that Max and Paddy have stolen the keys to all of his clients' cars. * CantHoldHisLiquor: Max accuses Paddy of this in the first episode but he contends that he must have been [[SlippingAMickey spiked]]. But by sheer confidence and the perceived urgency of the situation, they manage to pull it off. After an altercation with fellow prisoner Pepe, the pair of them meet Raymond the Bastard. The theme song was written by Toni Baker and Peter Kay, and borrowed heavily from the theme to the 1970s American series B. J. and the Bear. [[DescriptionCut And this is after Max has mentioned him "softening up" in recent years. Early life He trained at the Academy Drama School, where he was the recipient of the Stage Scholarship. Its. ]], * HeroicSacrifice: Tina is determined to keep the secret that [[spoiler: Max is Daniel's father]] because it will destroy her family, despite that it means [[spoiler: Max and Paddy being in prison because her going to the police and corroborating their story will reveal everything. However, the fight is prevented by a prison officer telling Max and Paddy to come with him. Also the farmer isn't very happy about the two killing one of his cows. ]], * HeroicSacrifice: Tina is determined to keep the secret that [[spoiler: Max is, * OhCrap: Replace crap with fuck and youve got Mick Bustins exact reaction when he sees [[spoiler: that Max and Paddy have stolen the keys to all of his clients cars.]]. You'd think by his name he'd be Indian, right? Furthermore, Billy catches Paddy going through his stuff and prepares to shoot him. Eventually, she goes to the Police and gets Max and Paddy released at the cost of keeping her secret, as well as finally letting Max meet Daniel after his release.]] The prisoners also turn against them after finding they are not big time thiefs, money they have also promised to Mr. Big for the easy life. After an altercation with a camp inmate called Pepe, Max and Paddy are soon confronted by the main man of their wing, Raymond The Bastard, who is also Pepe's boyfriend. He was tunnelling towards the next cell.]]. * IAmAHumanitarian: When pretending to be brutal gangsters, Paddy pretends to have eaten the last person who insulted him, with a perfectly serious face. * DoItYourselfThemeTune: The theme song was written by Toni Baker and Peter Kay, and borrowed heavily from the theme to ''Series/BJAndTheBear''. * DepravedHomosexual: While Raymond The Bastard is more evil than depraved, his first scene features him in the shower being lathered up by two of his cronies and complementing Paddys genitals. They're generally decent guys but not above stealing and conning people if it will benefit them. Thankfully when they turn around, the credits are used as a SceneryCensor. Brian has been [[spoiler: fronting a very public campaign to get Max and Paddy released from prison which destroys the persona of rich gangsters that they used to live an easy and safe life while inside. 35K views, 99 likes, 4 loves, 102 comments, 86 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from No Context Max and Paddy: You've got yourself a deal Mr Bastard! This joke is based around the rumour that Sunderland player John O'Shea is regularly teased by. * UsefulNotes/IrishTravellers: Gypsy Joe is possibly an Irish Traveller, judging by his accent and the nationality of his actor, though as far as Max and Paddy are concerned, he's just a RoguishRomani. ** Also, the farmer who sells Max and Paddy his pig. * {{Catchphrase}}: A few. After eventually realising what was going on, the three of them are caught in a chase in a service station, during which Billy shoots Paddy in the bottom. * StraightGay: Raymond The Bastard, compared to his boyfriend Pepe. I don't [[UnusualEuphemism drink from both pipes]] and [[HandsomeLech that lad]] ''definitely'' does not! They are fugitives due to an incident in the last episodes of Phoenix Nights, in which a club patron threatened to have them killed by hitmen. ]], * IWantMyBelovedToBeHappy: An example that is both romantic and non-romantic at the same time. Raymond has heard about the pair's alleged big-money heists and robberies, and wants a cut of their money. Raymond has heard about the pair's alleged big-money heists and robberies, and wants a cut of their money. The room full of male bodybuilders is certainly a clue though. Max has "How dare you" (delivered in a haughty tone) and "You only get a bucket and a half" (relating to the amount of semen a man can produce), and Paddy has "Paddy has needs" (relating to his sex drive). On one occasional, the pair end up in prison. He points the gun at Max who tells him he needs help. You'd think by his name he'd be Indian, right? ({{Beat}}) What do you want, son? A second series of the show was initially planned for 2006, but Peter Kay instead confirmed a third series of Phoenix Nights (which as of 2023 has not yet happened). * AmusingInjuries: Gypsy Joe's broken leg when Max and Paddy accidentally drop him from a TV screen(which they're using as a stretcher) from a great height. ), And best of all, we don't pay council tax!". [[spoiler: Max and Paddy get stuck with the job of shovelling coal into a furnace while in prison, and Max says that. * ChekhovsGunman / EarlyBirdCameo: Maxs ex-girlfriend Tina appears in flashbacks in Episode Two before playing an important role in Episodes Three and Four. 16K views, 122 likes, 8 loves, 189 comments, 132 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from No Context Max and Paddy: The art of negotiation - by Raymond the Bastard See FanDisservice. * SeinfeldianConversation: Max and Paddy have these fairly regularly. Brian brings Max and Paddy a cake while they are in prison and they immediately assume its this trope. * ChekhovsGunman: Maxs ex-girlfriend Tina appears in flashbacks in Episode Two before playing an important role in Episodes Three and Four. They crash the party and Max meets his old school pals. This joke is based around the rumour that Sunderland player John O'Shea is regularly teased by team-mates for his physical resemblance to Patrick [=McGuinness=]. It doesn't leave. While awaiting Tina's reluctant assistance to get them freed, they are forced to make a deal with Raymond the Bastard to share their non-existent loot. Following on from the hi-jacking, Max and Paddy are now serving time at Her Majesty's Pleasure. It doesn't leave that much poo on the floor of their motorhome, but it farts. After a stint in a porn film (a film called Willy Wanker and the Chocolate Factory - a gay porn parody of Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory) leaves Paddy humiliated, the campervan breaks down in the Midlands. The pair come up with a plan to convince their fellow cellmates they are hardened criminals named the Phoenix Twins, in order to survive. * ContinuityNod: When Young Kenny appears in Episode Four, he still has the impossible to remove tiger facepaint that he got at. Its [[RealityEnsues real life]], not the frigging [[Film/TheShawshankRedemption Shawshank Redemption]]. Things get worse for the duo when Brian Potter turns up, determined to get his doormen out of jail. After an altercation with a camp inmate called Pepe, Max and Paddy are soon confronted by the main man of their wing, Raymond The Bastard (played by Everal Walsh), who is also Pepe's boyfriend. * ButtMonkey: Gypsy Joe in the first episode. [1], His roles on television include Wayne in The Street, Raymond the Bastard in Max and Paddy's Road to Nowhere and Cecil in Prime Suspect 5. After knocking down a cow in the countryside, Max and Paddy approach who they believe to be the farmer and ask for compensation. Yesterday at 10:21 AM. in the process. With Shannon now unconscious and arrested, Max and Paddy slip away from a police lecture - due to the fact that earlier in the episode they cut down a speed camera - and drive-off into the night. [[spoiler: Daniel]] lampshades this. Raymond the Bastard? * MessyPig: Played with by the pig Max and Paddy end up buying from a mad farmer. The following morning, the two discover to their annoyance that they were a short walk away from a Petrol Station and a Travelodge. Unbeknowst to Max, Billy has become obsessed with Max and goes to all lengths to give Max what he wants. Max has "How dare you" (delivered in a haughty tone) and "You only get a bucket and a half" (relating to the amount of semen a man can produce), and Paddy has "Paddy has needs" (relating to his sex drive). Max and Paddy Quotes @maxandpaddyline 16 Sep 2017 Follow Follow @ maxandpaddyline Following Following @ maxandpaddyline Unfollow Unfollow @ maxandpaddyline Blocked Blocked @ maxandpaddyline Unblock Unblock @ maxandpaddyline Pending Pending follow request from @ maxandpaddyline Cancel Cancel your follow request to @ maxandpaddyline